April 19, 2005
paint therapy
I’m beginning to love my house again. Oh, sure, it still has issues–like the broken spigot in the boys’ bathroom, and the sink in the boys’ bathroom, and the tile in the boys’ bathroom, and–okay, the whole damn bathroom, really. And there’s the Bermuda grass, which is a WEED, people, it doesn’t even grow straight up, it grows to the SIDE for god’s sake, and it makes Charlie itchy. And there’s the horrible horrible teal green carpet in all the bed rooms and the leaky windows and the porch, oh the porch! the porch!
Ahem.
But all that aside, I really am falling in love with our house all over again. Charlie’s big boy room is finished, and the guest room is finished, and I’m going to paint Henry’s room this weekend (because he keeps asking in his cheery Henry voice, ‘When are you going to paint MY room, Mommy?’) and it all looks fantastic, if I do say so myself. Charlie’s room is the biggest success so far, because it let us move ALL THE PLASTIC TOYS out of our family room (which will no longer be referred to as ‘the playroom’, thank you very much). I had actually forgotten both how big and how lovely our family room is; this morning I sat on the sofa with a cup of coffee and gazed a the wood floor (which you can SEE now that it’s not covered in toys!) and remembered why we bought this house in the first place. Leslie came in yesterday and said, ‘Everything looks new!’ And it feels new, which is wonderful.
I think I needed a little new in my life just now. I am so worn down by the day-to-day of mommmying–the same lunches, the same laundry, the same tantrums, even the same conversations (about superheros! and their powers! and their costumes!). And then there are the really worrisome things, the stuff that keeps me awake at night and makes it even harder to mangle my way through the Groundhog Day of my life: Henry’s eyesight (he failed an eye test at school, while wearing his $300.00 glasses), the letter from the mortgage company saying that our homeowner’s insurance may–or may not–have lapsed (which of course came in Saturday’s mail, so I had to fret for two days before I could confirm that yes, it was a clerical error and all was well), and under it all my constant fear that I am so horribly unqualified for this job of wife and mother and Responsible Adult and that I am making a mess of my children’s lives, and our financial life, and . . . you get the picture.
So the painting was a nice break. Two weekends of watching the roller cover the walls, turning our house back into something nice, a place I like to be. Two weekends of Wade shuttling our kids to soccer and playdates and making their lunch and searching for their shoes and trying to keep them from jumping on or off of the furniture and each other. It was good to have time to myself that didn’t feel frivolous. I was doing something for our family, but all by myself. Like therapy, but cheaper and with immediate results.
I’ve also been recycling–pulling things out of one room and moving them to another. I’m not usually good at this; I have a hard time imagining things in other places, and I’m too damn lazy to move them around. Plus all those home shows suggest that you start by emptying the room–you know, TAKING ALL THE FURNITURE OUT. And putting it where, I always wonder? And so instead of even trying, I usually just go and buy something new (and then lay awake at night worrying about how much I have spent and whether we really even need the new thing and . . . ). But not this time–this time I have triumphed. I took the mirrors off our antique bedroom set and propped them on the mantel in the family room. Ta da! To my surprise, it looks fantastic; the mirrors are framed in cherry, and have a cool Gothic-ish shape. And best of all: it was FREE! Hooray! So now I feel thrifty and industrious, which satisfies the Puritan side of me, and I am happy in my house, which satisfies the Pottery Barn side of me. One more room to paint and I may actually start to love my life again.
It’s a lot to hope for, isn’t it?
Posted by Susan @ 8:05 pm • Uncategorized
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April 20th, 2005 at 7:12 am, ieatcrayonz Says:
It’s amazing that Sherwin Williams doesn’t have their own Dr. Phil show. I also fret over little things like toy clutter and rooms needing a new coat of paint. Then I realize I have it so much better than other people living a daily crisis. I have my health and a lovely family. That’s all I can hope for…and maybe a new coat of paint in the bathroom.
April 20th, 2005 at 1:14 pm, Susan Says:
Imagine what the paints in the Dr. Phil line would be called . . . Passive-Aggressive (a neutral with a hint of something else) or Denial (it’s blue. Really, it’s blue. Okay, it LOOKS green, but it’s BLUE!) or Success (a nice cheery yellow).
I love paint names.