October 12, 2007
let’s do it again sometime!
I’ve spent the last two days subbing in Charlie’s class at school. Every time I sub I wind up complaining about it to Chris, who says, “THEN JUST SAY NO.” It’s probably a good thing she lives so far away because if she were closer, she would get in the car and drive to my house and smack me.
And I would totally deserve it.
I have a hard time saying no when the school calls, because I love this school and it really IS fun to see my boys during their day and to know, first hand, that they are learning and thriving and functioning while I’m off doing whatever the hell it is I do for those seven hours every day.
The problem is that those seven hours are when I do all the things I do around here to keep this house and this family moving. It’s not ALL shoe shopping, you know! I have actual Contractual Obligations! To write about stuff! Plus there’s the laundry! And occasionally some cooking!
Okay, not so much with the cooking, but the writing and laundry take a LOT of time. ANYway.
I have what I like to call Chandler Bing Syndrome: remember that Friends episode when Rachel sets Chandler up on a date with her horrible boss, the one who was killed crossing the street hours after she offered to make Rachel a buyer but BEFORE she did the paperwork to make it official? What was her NAME? And Chandler goes on the date with her and doesn’t like her (she has mascara goop in the corner of her eye) but at the end of the evening, he says, “We should do this again! I’ll call you!” even though he has NO intention of calling her.
That’s what I do when I sub. At the end of the day, after counting every single second and fretting about all! that! laundry! I say cheerfully, “Call me any time!” And then I want to punch myself in the head because OH NO NO NO.
I agreed to this particular subbing gig WEEKS ago, thinking meh, what’s two days? But then I got that other job, which made things a little stressful because I’m still learning all the ins and outs of leading a blog (apparently being first in line on the way to Happy Hour was NOT what they had in mind when they said I would “lead”). But still, I had until MONDAY before I REALLY needed to be ready to roll!
Right.
I came home today to an e-mail box CHOCK FULL OF MESSAGES, all about work, including one that said, “Hey if you could start TODAY instead of Monday, that would be GREAT.” Do I get credit for a full day’s work if I didn’t do anything until 4:00? Central Standard time?
Probably not. But hey, we should do it again some time! I’ll call you!
Posted by Susan @ 3:58 pm • everyday life
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October 12th, 2007 at 7:00 pm, Barbetti Says:
I’m definitely the same way!
“What’s that? You want me to work ten hours on Saturday?” (After I’ve put in sixty that week.) “Sure! Sounds good! You bet! See you then!”
This is what causes me to indulge in vodka.
October 12th, 2007 at 7:13 pm, MamaChristy Says:
Joanna. The crazy boss was Joanna.
You’ll do fine in your new job. And if it makes you crazy (because you can’t get to the other things in your life), more to blog about at least.
October 12th, 2007 at 7:26 pm, Susan Says:
THANK YOU, Christy. That was making me crazy.
October 12th, 2007 at 9:26 pm, chris Says:
No,I wouldn’t smack you. I’d drive over and kidnap you so you couldn’t go sub.
October 13th, 2007 at 8:00 am, Lori Says:
I love that episode of Friends!
I have the same syndrome as you. I make myself too available for a cause. Except I’m not as busy as you, but it still leaves me sitting around on my ass waiting for people to possibly need me.
October 13th, 2007 at 10:23 am, Christine Says:
I just love, love, LOVE running across someone that has a similar Friends addiction.
Now, here’s my solution to the subbing dilemma. Call the school and let them know that you have taken on some more responsibilities. You need to take a little hiatus from subbing. Say … a month? Two? Til Christmas break? You decide. You make the decision for yourself BEFORE that early morning phone call when you feel like you are their ONLY option for that day and the whole thing will crumble into crap if you can’t be there. It won’t.
I also have my own personal policy: if I can’t do something, or I have to scale back (quit) for a period, I try to find at least one or two other people to help. I spend a lot of time recruiting. Then, when you do “come back,” you have already lightened the load for everyone through your fabulous networking and recruitment abilities.
If nothing else, drive the hour and half north to me, and I’ll smack you for Chris. We can take a pic and blog about it. It’ll be FUN!
October 13th, 2007 at 5:46 pm, D Says:
Yep, that’s Chandler’s problem … I have a friend who did that [and more]. Want help with the Daisy Scouts, oh, they need help with X, Y, and this thing at school Z? Yep, call her. She took on two babysitting jobs - and realized her daughter really didn’t like the kid, but she felt she owed the single-parent Mom ’til the end of the school year. She was kvetching and finally, over the summer she had this BLINDING realization - her kids were growing up and she wasn’t having “fun” with them. Everything was taken up with chores, carpoolings, or whatever … so she canceled a lot of stuff [including the babysitting gig] - scaled way down - and realized that she’d do two things - Brownie Scouts and volunteering at her children’s schools once a week - that’s it. She’s been a lot happier, freer, calmer, and a much less frazzled person for it.
Might wanna think about it … having a sane Mum is important for the kids … at least that’s what my hubby thinks.
October 13th, 2007 at 7:35 pm, All Adither Says:
I always think of Rachel’s boss as “the big dull dud” because that’s what he called her and it made me laugh raucously. Still does. And I still use that phrase. Mostly to describe myself.
October 14th, 2007 at 11:27 pm, gena Says:
I do this too, say yes when I really want to say no. I did this quite a lot when my older three were little, but now with the twins, I am finally learning to say “I am sorry, I already have plans that day”. Most people don’t even ask what my plans are and if they do I say “appointments and errands” no matter the plans or lack of.
It works. I promise.
gena
aka: threeplustwo
(another Friends fan)
October 15th, 2007 at 9:04 pm, MommyWithAttitude Says:
Congrats on the new job!