November 10, 2005
just to convince you that I am the one who REALLY needs the meds
On the way home from Charlie’s school (where he pooped in the potty! Hooray!), we zipped through the pharmacy drive-thru to pick up Henry’s new meds.* I had taken the precaution of calling Wade as I left the pediatrician’s office this morning, both to inform him of the Meds Plan and to get our story straight about what exactly we were putting in Henry’s applesauce and why exactly he was having applesauce for breakfast.** Our story is that we are adding a new allergy medicine, to help him stop sneezing. Yes, it’s a lie, but whatever. I’m a terrible mother, we all knew that.
So I pull into the pharmacy drive-thru and immediately realize that Henry will hear me ask for his prescription BY HIS NAME and will start asking questions. But I can’t get out of the line, so I just go for it. And sure enough, as SOON as I tell the tech why I am there, he pipes up: ‘What do I need a prescription for? I’m not sick.’
‘For your allergies!’ I say, trying to sound breezy (remember that Friends episode?).
‘Does it go in my juice?’ he asks warily.
‘Nope!’ I say, now sounding a little bit demented in my breezy cheer. ‘It will go in some applesauce. Won’t that be fun!’
‘I’m not going to take it,’ he says firmly. ‘I won’t like it.’
I’m scrambling for something breezy to say, all the while remembering the huge screaming tantrum he threw when we tried to introduce chewable vitamins, and the tech comes back to the window to ask me for my home address. And I draw a COMPLETE BLANK. I think and think as time ticks by and the tech stares at me out the window, holding Henry’s prescription in her hand. Finally I start to recite the street address of the first house we lived in in Albuquerque, a house my parents sold TWENTY TWO YEARS AGO. I know that’s the wrong address, so I open my wallet to look at my drivers’ license, because what else am I going to do, but I can’t read the street number, because the license is in crooked from when I took it out to give it to the first tech when I dropped the prescription off.*** Finally my brain clicks back on and I am able to tell the nice woman where I live, although she’s looking at me a little funny.
‘That will be $25.00,’ she says.****
And I reach out the window to put my debit card in the drawer and drop it on the ground and have to get out of the car IN THE DRIVE THRU LINE to pick it up. Ha ha ha! So very funny. And yet she still gave me the drugs.
Because it was clear that I needed them.
*Adderal EX, 5 milligrams per day. Watch this space for more details once we load the boy up with his drugs. Which will be tomorrow morning.
**It should come as no surprise that Henry does NOT like new medicine, of any sort. However, he happily takes a disgusting cocktail of orange juice, Claritin OTC, and Poly-Vi-Sol liquid vitamins EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. He will actually remind me if I forget to give it to him. Sadly, the Adderall cannot be mixed with anything but applesauce.
***Adderall is a ’scheduled’ drug, which translates to ‘pain in the ass to fill.’ Henry’s doctor can only prescribe a 30-day supply at one time, and I have to have a WRITTEN prescription each time (no phone refills). And I will have to show ID every time. But it’s worth it! Yes it is!
****That’s my co-pay. Actual cost, for a 30-day supply: $129.99. Yep. ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY NINE DOLLARS AND NINTY NINE CENTS. Jesus Muffy.
Posted by Susan @ 3:27 pm • Uncategorized
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November 10th, 2005 at 4:06 pm, Missy Says:
Want to trade? Derek is on Strattera and it’s $250 for 30 days. But at least he just pops it, I don’t have to mix it into anything. Good luck! I’ll be thinking about you.
November 10th, 2005 at 5:23 pm, Heather K Says:
Hope he has a change of heart about the applesauce! Poly-vis-sol??? That stuff made my daughter hurl and I tried it and wanted to do the same!
November 10th, 2005 at 5:27 pm, llama Says:
I hope Henry gives in and takes it and I hope it helps. Thinking of you…
November 10th, 2005 at 6:32 pm, Susan Says:
Heather, the great irony about Henry and the vitamins is that the Poly-Vi-Sol IS disgusting (especially when mixed with the juice AND the Claritin)–but he WILL NOT take the Pooh Chewables.
Charlie, on the other hand, BEGS for the vitamins, and will announce, ‘It tastes like candy!’
My kids are so damn wierd. What would Mrs. Walton do?
November 10th, 2005 at 6:56 pm, Dawn Says:
Oh sistah, that is Em’s drug o choice. Nothing like getting the “texture sensitive” to take a pill.
Her:GAAAAAGGG.
Me: You better not throw that up!!!!
But, we have also tried Yogurt, and Whipped cream with success.
And yes, I love the covert drug picking up. I swear they do an eye scan, and ask you secret passwords and NO, it can not be called in by the doctor and NO, it can not be a mail away 3 month supply and NO, don’t ever ever ever tell anyone in the known universe that it is in your house or the crazy Adderall freaks will break into your house and mug you for it.
I thought our doctor was kidding at first…but she wasn’t.
I hope that it goes well.
November 10th, 2005 at 9:45 pm, the ockers Says:
wow, that drug is going to be expensive on you guys. Hope it does the job. & Dawn (Or Susan) is Adderall a kind of amphetamine or something? I can’t think what kind of drug you’d get mugged for And kids would be prescribed?
November 11th, 2005 at 6:21 am, Felicity Says:
I’m not hijakcing, really, but I want to tell the funny story about me crying at the pharamcists counter when he thought he wasn’t going to give me my antidepressants. Really, sobbing, begging like a damn junkie. That’s me.
November 11th, 2005 at 7:44 am, Heather Says:
And I thought Drive-thrus were only for Coffee and Hamburgers. I if it were me, I’d would have asked for a Big Mac meal at the pharmacy window.
And you’ll be happy to know that I never remember my own phone number. Never. (I usually start with the one I had 5 years ago..)
Hope he takes it well! Can you use chocolate syrup??
H
November 11th, 2005 at 8:42 am, Juggling Mother Says:
Whoop Whoop for the National Health Service. If Mstr A gets precscribed anything, it’s absolutely free (to me, obviously it comes out of my taxes in the long run…)
But no drive thru Pharmacies over here. Never even heard of them:-)
Hope it works & he decides he loves apple sauce after all.
November 11th, 2005 at 9:40 am, Mary P. Says:
Drive through pharmacies? What a concept!! I’m curious: we have drive-through fast food places and coffee shops and the occasional drive-through bank machine, but nothing else up here. What else is drive-through down there?
Here’s hoping Henry decides that the applesauce is a great idea!! I have a technique that works with reluctant two and unders, but would only be very messy with five year old, I fear.
My youngest, at twelve, still can’t manage pills, so we still crush them and serve them with yoghurt.
November 11th, 2005 at 9:41 am, Mary P. Says:
“Jesus Muffy.” Thanks!
LOL
November 11th, 2005 at 11:48 am, Nothing But Bonfires Says:
Sooooo….do you think EVERYONE has to show ID every month? Or just you, so that they can make sure you don’t try and trick them with any more fake addresses?!