February 12, 2007
hip to be square
I find this whole “hipster parents” thing very confusing, and also a little vexing. On the one hand, I can confidently assert that I am most certainly NOT a hipster parent: I wear capri pants and Keds, not skinny jeans and Chuck Taylors, my kids listen to Sandra Boynton, not the Beatles, and my husband drives his Lexus to work in a tie every day. My children not only go to private school but to schools where they are learning to have a personal relationship with Jesus. We’re thinking about joining a COUNTRY CLUB, for god’s sake. Total squaresville.
But . . . but.
When I rent Scooby Doo videos for the boys, I get the classic episodes, from my childhood, not the Cartoon Network versions. We listen to XM radio in the car, and both boys will ask politely for me to “find some rock and roll.” Henry likes Green Day, and Charlie is partial to old REM; at home, we dance to the Grosse Pointe Blank soundtrack. I wear leopard print flats with my capris. I self-identify as a liberal in a state when even the Democrats proudly proclaim their conservatism. I get my news from the New York Times and Slate and Salon.com. I listen to NPR all day.
When people ask what I do, I say, “I’m a freelance writer.”
Does that make me hip?
When I graduated from college, the marketing demographic I fell into was Generation X (yes, I’m THAT old). We were slackers who refused to grow up, environmentally minded but aimless, smart but unmotivated. I hated the media representation of my “generation” because it didn’t apply to me. And I hated it because it did.
I think I feel the same way about hipster parents. I like the idea that having children doesn’t mean sacrificing your cool, but I can’t stand the commodification of that cool. I’m also tired of the way the hipster label is being used to criticize parents who aren’t all about cool, parents who are good with Elmo and The Wiggles and letting kids be kids.
Parents like me.
Posted by Susan @ 4:52 pm • Uncategorized
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February 13th, 2007 at 3:16 pm, ieatcrayonz Says:
You stay here any longer and this will become a liberal state.
You watch.
February 13th, 2007 at 4:58 pm, Mark Says:
ieat, I pray you are right. Sadly, good old Oklahoma was once a progressive state, but they let it get away.
And I love my xm, Bob Edwards in the morning!
February 13th, 2007 at 5:54 pm, Jen Says:
I am too old to be a hipster parent. It’s too late. My children have plastic toys, we eat at McDonald’s, and we have an X-Box, and a DVD player for the car.
All of us like sugar.
And I am pretty happy with the way things are. Oh, have to go. A TV show that I like is coming on, and I am going to go and watch it.
February 13th, 2007 at 6:12 pm, Susan Says:
Mmm, sugar. Does feeding the kids PopTarts for snack mean I’m not a hipster?
Then so be it.
February 13th, 2007 at 7:47 pm, Mark Says:
You let your kids have poptarts? I refuse to share mine, she can stick with Snoopy Snacks
February 13th, 2007 at 7:56 pm, Susan Says:
Mark, I am unfamiliar with Snoopy snacks. But I will look for them the next time I’m at Target. (See, hip! Target! Not WalMart, which makes me feel like I’m going to have a seizure!)
You can see why this is vexing.
February 13th, 2007 at 8:08 pm, Magpie Says:
It’s the lighting in Walmart that makes you feel like you’re about to have a seizure. I think the whole labeling thing is crazy - parents are parents, people are people. Whatever. I wear Keds and make my own granola and pay the mortgage. What’s that make me?
February 13th, 2007 at 8:17 pm, Susan Says:
Magpie, it makes you someone who needs to GIVE ME HER GRANOLA RECIPE.
Please.
And yes, I agree, we’re all doing the best we can in whatever way works for us. The media’s insistence on labeling and grouping, and then on pitting the labeled groups against one another, drives me crazy.
Now, about that granola . . .
February 13th, 2007 at 9:01 pm, Karyn Says:
Whoa baby - what do you mean “i’m THAT old” ?! Gen Xers are COOL, man. We ROCK.
Shit. We are old aren’t we?
How did that happen exactly?
February 13th, 2007 at 9:25 pm, Jenn Says:
ugh - I have a seizure just *thinking* about Walmart… but I have been known to grace the cluttered aisles of a Zellers (which ain’t much better…) for the sake of a sale priced Diaper Genie.
why do I get the sneaking suspicion that hipsters don’t use Diaper Genies?
February 13th, 2007 at 10:00 pm, margalit Says:
I am so old I have leopard skin from the first time it was popular, like in the 50’s. So totally not hip.
February 13th, 2007 at 10:06 pm, Rocks In My Dryer Says:
*sigh* I LOVE this post.
February 13th, 2007 at 11:51 pm, Meredith Says:
I think it is a little too black and white. I have met what I considered “hipster” parents who have loads of tattoos and piercings and have cool clothes and only eat organic foods but they also let their kids watch TV (typical cartoons) and they do play dates and in a lot of ways, are your average boring parents.
I think “hip” applies to lots of people. I think you are hip but I don’t think of it as an insult for anyone. I aspire to hipness!
Please make OK more progressive!
February 13th, 2007 at 11:54 pm, Busy Mom Says:
I am older than Generation X.
Perhaps there’s an element that needs to concentrate a little less on being “hip” and a little more on being parents.
The whole idea that parenting needs “updating” is a little tiresome.
February 14th, 2007 at 7:17 am, Rayne of Terror Says:
How can you be hip when you referenced Huey Louis in the title?
We too have our bourgeois aspirations. Does the fact we winkingly call them bourgeois make us hip? No. I thought music was over when Phish broke up. My 2 year old asks for more Rachmoninov on the XM and that makes me proud.
Maybe hipness would be easier to strive for if we lived in Chicago, but in rural central Illinois it’s nigh impossible.
February 14th, 2007 at 9:42 am, Pendullum Says:
I do not find myself cool or square…
I just find that sometimes I think…Whoa when did I grow up??? Is this really my beautiful house?
Is this really my wonderful husband? And when, when did I have this extrodinary child? When?
I do not care what people think of me? or how I can look on the outside…
February 14th, 2007 at 10:59 am, Mara Says:
I think that the whole “hipster parent” thing is not really about being “hip”, it is about retaining an original identity after becoming a parent.
Being a hipster parent (assuming one was hip to begin with) falls into the same category as Melissa’s Cocktail Playdates, or your Friday Style. Why give up alcohol (or adult socialization), or fashion, or good music, or (fill in the blank) after having offspring?
It’s not about WHICH music, WHICH fashions/images, or WHICH politics you go with, it’s about making decisions based on your own personality and not your parental status, which is why the concept rankles with some– the same people rankled by the idea of mature, adult women enjoying a glass of wine while their children play.
February 14th, 2007 at 11:14 am, chilihead Says:
If by “hipster” you mean loads of junk in my trunk, then I’m leading the pack. Otherwise I’m just a Gen Xer like the rest.
February 14th, 2007 at 12:55 pm, okie mom Says:
Quoting busy mom: Perhaps there’s an element that needs to concentrate a little less on being “hip” and a little more on being parents.
AMEN, Sister! And forget the labels.
Don’t fret, Susan. You’re doing a terrific job!
(from a smack-in-the-middle baby boomer)
February 14th, 2007 at 5:07 pm, rachel Says:
I think you said it very well. I’m not entering the debate. Because I’m a weenie. Nooo, it’s because I tend to have a foot in too many camps. gah - I wish the mommy wars would call a truce.
(and that there was an end for word verification - my vision sucks)
February 15th, 2007 at 12:53 pm, Darren a/k/a Clare's Dad Says:
I’m a gen-X dad who could be described in a lot of the same ways (except for the capri pants…that would be too hipster if I wore them). I think we’re all hipster if we want to be. It is just about keeping our identities and being true to them and our kids. And anyone else who tries to put some label on us just isn’t hip.
P.S. The word verification for this comment starts with “hip.” How hip is that?
February 15th, 2007 at 6:35 pm, daysgoby Says:
Ah, Jenn, but Zellers IS the red-headed Canadian cousin of Target!
(At least, that’s what I TELL myself…)
S - I think all the old labels have been retired. What would YOU call your generation?
February 15th, 2007 at 11:06 pm, Jamie Says:
If it is cool to contemplate a workout to veggie tales videos then I am soooo cool
February 16th, 2007 at 9:06 am, MaryP Says:
I don’t think I’ve ever been “hip”, and I don’t think, except for three years in my teens, I ever cared one way or the other.
Why must we forever slap labels on ourselves and each other?
I read the tots Sandra Boynton while we listen to the Beatles.
Because we like them. Not because someone has put them on - or taken them off - some entirely random, hugely arbitrary list of what makes for cool, or hip, or whatever.
Who gives a damn what’s on the list? Why, once you’re out of your teens, does anyone worry about ‘hip’? It’s just another way of separating the ‘us’ from the ‘them’, and the fact that supposed adults give it a second’s thought annoys the crap out of me, frankly.
February 16th, 2007 at 12:24 pm, cape buffalo Says:
“the commodification of that cool”
Thank you for putting into words the THING (for lack of a better term) that bugs me about “hipness.” The commodification makes it all about exclusivity in a shitty high school way. Not cool enough to sit at our table, not cool enough for us to hang out at your blog, phffft.
Why can’t be all just get along?