March 27, 2008
all’s right with the world
Here’s the thing about kids like Henry: they have moments where they are struggling just to exist in the world, and then they take a deep breath and they move on and are happy and peaceful and perfect again.
Of course, their mamas are still lying on the floor in a puddle of guilt and angst and sadness, but whatever.
Over the weekend, my friend Mir had a Very Long Day with her son; when we talked on Monday, she said that while Monkey had bounced right back, she had laid awake most of the night on Saturday, just recovering and thinking and being the mama.
When I asked how she was, I believe her exact words were, “I am very tired.”
The rest of Henry’s day yesterday was good; he did get into trouble at school, but not for saying that everyone was going to DIE. No, he got caught reading a book under his desk when he was supposed to be working on his math.
“I got distracted by my novel,” he told me. And I was so proud because if is going to get busted at school, it might as well be for READING A BOOK. Also because I can vividly remember sneaking novels into my school bag to read under the desk after I finished my work (or occasionally INSTEAD of finishing my work).
So he got into trouble for a normal kid thing. Way to go, son.
Of course, his teacher took the book away, and then at the end of the day, when he begged to have it back, she told him that he would have to wait until tomorrow, because apparently one of the conditions of the return was that he NOT ask about the book (”I forgot, though,” he told me sadly, which I totally believe). The whole incident makes me love his teacher even more, because that is precisely what we do at home when he is distracted and not doing what he’s been asked to do.
See? It turned out to be a totally normal day. Of course.
I mauled through the rest of my day, which included killing two wasps INSIDE MY HOUSE, which was kind of theraputic actually. The first one buzzed by my head as I was sitting at the kitchen table working; I leapt up and yelled something that would probably give my mother a heart attack because I was ALREADY A LITTLE EDGY and then I stalked the sucker until it landed on the widow sill and smashed it with a J. Crew catalog (it was the ONLY THING I COULD FIND, you all — plus I get a new one every 72 hours). I beat the second one to a pulp while I was on the phone with my neighbor, who said, “Don’t you feel better now?” And yes, I did.
Today was a brand new day, and we all had a good morning. Henry got dressed for school (in his shorts and his button down and his tie) and when I asked if he had EVERYTHING he needed for school he said, “My book is right here, and I just need to get some money for the collection plate at Mass.” But then he forgot to get his money, and as he was putting on his shoes he got a little panicked. “I don’t have any thing for the collection!” he said, his eyes wide.
“How about if I give you fifty cents from the jar down here?” I said.
He thought about it and said, “Okay, I’ll pay you back later.”
I told him he didn’t have to do that. Really.
(Thanks to everyone for your comments and emails and IMs and phone calls. You can’t even imagine how much I appreciate all of them. Really and truly.)
Posted by Susan @ 10:35 am • just happy to be here, those damn kids
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March 27th, 2008 at 11:06 am, BethanyWD Says:
Gosh, I have just the same reaction that you and Mir do - the tossing and turning all night. Gah. The morning always brings hope, though.
March 27th, 2008 at 11:14 am, Jamie AZ Says:
Whew, getting in trouble for reading - such a “cool” reason to get in trouble in school.
It’s been a trying time around here, too, with my 6.5 year old and his attitude/outbursts. I advised today that he’d be in a better spot if he came home from school with a different attitude than yesterday/this morning. Let’s hope he complies.
March 27th, 2008 at 12:11 pm, Velma Says:
You are one of my heroes, Susan, just for getting through your days and sharing them with us.
We had a major flip out episode this morning because the toothbrushing ritual got interrupted, because the floss picks had been moved and he couldn’t find them and then he didn’t get bright blue toothpaste on every single tooth and we had to start all over again and then the babysitter made a helpful comment about how he could just using a regular toothpick and well, you can guess how that went over. So, uhm, yeah. One of those days.
March 27th, 2008 at 12:16 pm, Sherry Says:
How funny. We went to a parent-teacher conference on Monday and The Boy’s teacher said he got in trouble earlier that day for reading when he was supposed to be doing math. He would get caught, put the book up, and then a little while later, get it back out. It did this a couple of times until he got in trouble. Maybe we are related somehow…
March 27th, 2008 at 12:24 pm, Jenn @ Juggling Life Says:
Reading instead of doing homework . . . that would define my entire early academic history!
March 27th, 2008 at 12:29 pm, jen Says:
Somehow, I don’t know how, things have been calmer here. Maybe A’s listening therapy is working. I’m just tiptoeing around, hoping and praying that this isn’t a fluke. He’s so much more pleasant to be around right now. I know we’ll have a setback at some point and then I’ll be pouring wine at 5pm sharp, but for now…things are remarkably “normal.”
March 27th, 2008 at 8:15 pm, STL Mom Says:
Oh, I’m so happy to read that today was better.
And reading instead of doing math? Let’s just say that I spent half of 5th grade in the nurse’s office, reading on a cot, pretending to be sick, during math class. Then they banned me from the nurse’s office for the rest of the year. Apparently getting sick at the same time every day is a strategy that only works for a limited time…
March 28th, 2008 at 8:12 am, cce Says:
They do bounce back so much quicker than we do. I can walk around in my guilt for days while they just blithely dust things off and carry on.
I can so relate to the covert book reading during school. I spent my entire academic career with my nose buried in some unrelated novel just to endure the tedium that was school.
March 28th, 2008 at 9:39 am, angela Says:
I’m glad things got better. They always seem to do that, don’t they?
I can remember sneaking books into school also. Sometimes I sneak books into work now. It makes the day a little sunnier. =)
March 28th, 2008 at 11:45 am, Stacey Says:
All this time I thought I was the only weird person in the world who would sneak reading books, when I was supposed to be cleaning my room~I would be under my bed, or in the closet–
it didn’t even matter that I might of already read that book 6 times, it was ALWAYS more interesting than what I was supposed to be doing!
March 28th, 2008 at 6:47 pm, Kerri Anne Says:
I too was in perpetual trouble for sneaking books during all other studies that weren’t English/Reading related. I’m glad today (or yesterday, as it were) was a better day.
March 29th, 2008 at 12:50 pm, MommyWithAttitude Says:
I suppose there are worse vices than reading…
March 29th, 2008 at 4:10 pm, blackbird Says:
…and that’s the thing.
Life goes on.
March 30th, 2008 at 12:35 pm, crockpot lady Says:
I used to get in trouble for reading in school, too.
I’m glad that the rest of your day went well.
xox
steph