March 20, 2008

when I was a kid …

Recently I have started spouting off about how things were when I was a kid. I can’t stop myself — no matter who I am talking to or what we’re talking about, I find myself declaring that THINGS USED TO BE DIFFERENT, DAMMIT.

Today we colored Easter eggs with my neighbor and her son. I hardboiled two dozen eggs for three little boys, because apparently I am insane; when I told my neighbor how many eggs there were, she said, “Oh good because I’ve never dyed Easter eggs either!”

Which of COURSE was just the opening I needed to start holding forth about what things were like in MY childhood.

Poor Rita. She has to listen to me and she’s pregnant and can’t even drink. Or at least not enough to drown out my reminiscing.

The dye kits came with all sorts of bling — glitter and special cups for the dye and stickers. I kept announcing, “When I was a kid, my mom just put the dye in a coffee cup!” and “When I was a kid, we didn’t have STICKERS, just DYE.”

I’m lucky no one threw eggs at me.

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March 19, 2008

is it spring yet?

Things I am not ready for: on the way to school this morning, Charlie asks, out of the blue and very seriously, “Mama, how does the baby get out of the mommy’s tummy?”

And I say, “Oh, buddy, I don’t know. I didn’t go to medical school, you know!”

Go ahead, judge me. I don’t think well on my feet first thing in the morning.

After school, I take the boys to Saturn Grill for a snack, and then to the drugstore to pick up Henry’s medication. He takes this particular medication for his anxiety, but he’s seven so we just tell him it’s for his allergies. Which he worries about.  Because he is ANXIOUS, you see.

I can’t imagine where he gets it.

I pull up to the drive-through window and the pharmacist happily informs me that the drug company is discontinuing this medication! and that the pharmacy is almost out! thank you for shopping at Walgreens!

Henry says, “What did she say? What’s wrong with my medicine?”

“Nothing, buddy,” I tell him, “they’re just not making it any more.”

“But but but,” he splutters, “WHAT WILL I TAKE FOR MY ALLERGIES?!?”

Those two moments pretty much sum up my whole day.  They also leave me thinking that maybe I should have gone to medical school after all.

March 18, 2008

what have I been doing?

Chris called me this morning. “I linked to you today,” she said. “So you might want to post something.”

“Meh,” I said. “Maybe. If anything good happens today.”

Nothing happened. Seriously.

Wade and I are watching The Real Housewives of New York right now; it is truly mesmerizing. Like a black hole of stupidity. Really wealthy overdressed stupidity. It is also the most interesting thing that has happened all day.

I would look away, but Life in the Fab Lane isn’t on tonight. I love me some Kimora Lee Simmons. Seriously. All kinds of things happen to Kimora Lee. Also she owns 400 pairs of jeans, not a single one of which EVER makes an appearance on her show. Go figure.

Today is Tuesday, which means that I am all over the Internet (because good lord are you still here? nothing to see! move along! watching trashy Bravo reality TV! sheesh). At Work It Mom! I’m asking what you wear to work at home; at BlogHer I’m wondering what inspires you to get dressed up.  And at AisleDash I’m speculating about the marriages and tattoos of various celebrities. It’s a tough job but someone has to do it.

And now I have to get back to the Real Housewives.  I sense some drahmah coming.  God knows there was none of that in my day.

I’ll bet Kimora Lee had dramah today.  And 400 pairs of jeans.

March 12, 2008

spring break, day three: it’s a total zoo around here

I took the boys to the zoo today, because it was EIGHTY DEGREES in Oklahoma City (thank you Jesus). We saw the baby lions and the snow leopard and some turkeys and a whole slew of bats.  And then we went out for lunch and played outside and went to the grocery and watched a movie and cooked hamburgers on the grill.

It was a really lovely day.

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March 11, 2008

spring break, day two: use the bumpers!

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March 10, 2008

spring break, day one: what does she DO for $5,000 an hour?

Today is Day One of my kids’ break, which conveniently follows both daylight savings time AND a Sunday night kid birthday party. The boys are overtired and jacked up and truly a pleasure to be around.  And then NEXT week, they will go to school for four days and be out on Friday, for Easter.  That would be the SAME Friday when I am having my hair cut and colored.  I will be taking them WITH ME, assuming we all survive this week of togetherness.

Kill me now.

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