This week I had an e-mail from Jillian, and I’m stumped. I know, hard to believe! But there it is. She wrote, “I am currently stationed overseas and have come to realize that most German women have no curves. Where is a good place to order jeans, etc, for a curvy person that don’t cost an arm and a leg?” She added that her soldier husband has suggested that she just wear his old jeans.

I can answer half of Jillian’s question: do NOT wear your husband’s (or boyfriend’s or male roomate’s or brother’s) jeans UNLESS you happen, by some cosmic fluke, to ACTUALLY wear his size. Men’s jeans are fine for the girls–I have friends who swear by them–but for the love of all that is denim, buy your own. There is no rule that says you MUST shop in the women’s department, but it is IMPERATIVE that whatever you buy fit properly. No disrespect to Jillian’s soldier husband (God love him and keep him safe) but no, no, no! His jeans are his jeans, and that’s how it should stay.

In fact, this holds true for pretty much everything in your husband’s closet. Every time I read an article suggesting that you borrow his dress shirts to wear with your ball gown, a la Sharon Stone at the 1998 Oscars, I want to scream. Sharon Stone has an army of stylists getting her ready for events; she could wear a grocery sack and look stunning. The rest of us, however, have only ourselves, and I guarantee you that wearing clothing borrowed from the man in your life will make you look less like a celebrity and more like someone who forgot to do laundry.

Okay, enough said.

Now we get to the part that stumped me: where can Jillian find affordable, curvy jeans that can be shipped to Germany? I suggested gap.com, although I’m not sure about their international shipping policies, but I’m sure you all have other favorite sites. So let’s hear about them! Curvy girls, where are you shopping? And why do you love the sites you love?

I also had an e-mail from the always-lovely Melissa, which I read and responded to and deleted (and then restarted the iBook, thus forever losing the deleted e-mail. Argh). The point, though, was this: Melissa recently cashed in an Ann Taylor gift card. She wound up with a beautiful camisole, a jean skirt, and a necklace. I loved the skirt and LOVED the camisole, but I was the most excited about the necklace (which I can’t find the link to) not specifically because of anything about the necklace but because SHE BOUGHT A NECKLACE.

It’s all about accessorizing, baby.

I am firmly convinced that no one needs a LOT of clothes; what you need are the RIGHT clothes, clothes that work for your body and your lifestyle. Having a closet full of basic pieces that mix and match and FIT makes getting dressed easy. Having a few beautiful accessories makes getting dressed fun.

As with clothes, you don’t need a lot of accessories, and you don’t need to spend a lot on them. I like one-of-a-kind jewelry, so I tend to shop in little galleries rather than department stores, which is honestly not as pricey as it sounds, although it can be hit-or-miss. But recently, I bought a necklace at SuperTarget (on CLEARANCE, even, aren’t you proud?) and I get compliments on it every time I wear it. I also wear my pretend diamond earrings most of the time; I found them at Old Navy for $7.00. SEVEN DOLLARS, people!

Jewelry can make your everyday clothes seem more festive and special. A necklace is a simple way to dress up a t-shirt, as is a pair of dangly earrings (but not together–too much is just TOO MUCH). Necklaces are also good if you have very small children; Melissa was pointing out that her baby is less likely to injure her by pulling on the necklace than, say, on a pair of earrings. Bracelets, if you don’t mind them, are also easy around babies, although they tend to get chewed on. And then there’s my house, where Charlie just wants to WEAR my bracelets all the time. But maybe that’s not a problem for you!

Moving on.

Think about your jewelry like you do your clothes; try not to segregate things into Everyday and Fancy. I have some lovely faux pearls that Wade gave me for my thirtieth birthday; I wear them with a t-shirt and jeans and my suede jacket. In the same way, a funky necklace can be really cool with a cocktail dress. I have jewelry that I wear every day–my mother’s white gold wristwatch, my silver locket bracelet (or my baby names bracelet, which is silver and gold), my wedding rings (gold). I almost always wear earrings. I keep my jewelry where I can find it easily, in case I get the urge to wear something different, but I tend to go for the same pieces all the time, mostly because I get dressed BEFORE I have coffee, so my decision making skills are not really at their best.

It is important, thought, to think about how your jewelry goes with what you’re wearing. A turtleneck calls for small earrings, and for a longer necklace (if any). A boatneck is great for dangly earrings but not for a necklace. Three-quarter length sleeves are perfect for a bracelet. I prefer a choker-length necklace for every day, something that falls right where the crew neck on my t-shirt hits me, but other people like something longer. Think also about color. You can match things (blue beads with a blue sweater) but that can be boring. Mix it up a little; wear the blue beads with a brown t-shirt, or some black beads with your white tee. Have fun with your jewelry.

As with clothes, don’t wear jewelry you’re not comfortable with. Don’t like bracelets? Don’t wear them. Pearls make you feel like June Cleaver? Don’t wear them (unless you like the June Cleaver thing, then have at it). Mixing gold and silver is fine, as long as you do it thoughtfully. If you have one piece that you love, wear it every day. Getting dressed shouldn’t be hard; the idea is to look nice and to FEEL like you look nice.

Okay! So tell me where Jillian can find some jeans, will you?